WHERE IS THERE?

              “Where is There?” Kelly’s words continue to ring in my mind from time to time. This is a picture of Kelly. The insert is of Kelly on the left and her mother on the right.
               Kelly was a precious student of mine when I was teaching/coaching At KingwoodHigh School. We lost Kelly to suicide but she will never belost to us or to our Lord. Kelly wrote a lot of poetry and one of them was: “Where is There?”  Her mother Carolyn and I are very close friends. This is Kelly’s poem. [Given by permission of her mother. It is copyrighted and can only be used through permission. Carolyn is planning to publish Kelly’s works soon. She has published articles warning young people and comforting parents. When it is published  you can order her book. Until then do not use it without her permission. Thanks, Gwen.]

WHERE IS THERE?
WHERE IS “THERE”?
CAN I GET TO “THERE” FROM HERE?
PEOPLE SAY, “GO HERE, GO ‘THERE’.”
DO THIS, DO THAT!
SOME SAY, “I”VE COME TO TAKE YOU ‘THERE’.”
OTHERS SAY, “BEWARE, DON’T DARE, JUST SIT ‘THERE’.”
IT’S HARD TO KNOW WHAT TO DO.
I’M NOT WHERE I STARTED.
THEY SAY “THERE” IS A WAY.
YOU’LL FIND IT SOME DAY.
I’M NOT “THERE” YET.

I DON’T KNOW WHERE I AM.
I’M JUST “IN BETWEEN.”
THIS BUSINESS OF LIVING, MAKES ME CRY OUT LOUD!
I’M TRYING TO GET “THERE”, DON’T YOU SEE?

ALL I’M ASKING IS LET ME BE ME.
I’M AN INDIVIDUAL, TREAT ME SO!
IF I KNEW WHERE “THERE” WAS, I SURELY WOULD GO.
MY MIND, MY SPIRIT, MY BODY STRAINS WITH GROWING PAINS.
I’LL MAKE MY MISTAKES, I’LL HOPE FOR A BREAK.
I MUST CRAWL BEFORE I WALK.
SO BE “THERE” WHEN I WANT TO TALK.

“I’LL BE ‘THERE’ WHEN YOU NEED ME,” MY MAMA OFTEN SAID.
“I CAN’T FIND THE DOOR,” I YELL, “THERE’S CONFUSION IN MY HEAD!”
“STAY ‘THERE’, MOM, TILL I GET ‘THERE’, AND IN ME, BELIEVE!”
I HAVE SO LITTLE TIME AND SO MUCH TO ACHIEVE.
THE WAY TO “THERE” SEEMS HOPELESS!
DON’T GIVE UP --- JUST WAIT.
I MAY BE LATE.
I’VE GOT LOTS TO LEARN ALONG THE WAY.
BUT I’LL MEET YOU “THERE” ONE DAY.

                                                                           Your Daughter

               Today as her words filtered through to me once again, I received the wonderful revelation that for today, I am there.
               Living alone, facing loneliness at times, I may have the tendency to think that I need to make a move, but have absolutely no idea where that would be. Thinking I should follow the patterns of my old life, it’s a lot like the saying, “I’ve been there – done that – bought the t-shirt.” I no longer have the desire to repeat my history. “Why, Lord? Is something wrong with me?” 
               An awesome awareness came over me and I said, “Lord…You are showing me that I AM “THERE.”
               Not everyone recognizes their “there”. Especially those who are much younger than I, who are still traveling toward their dreams. Since I was a child, God gave me the desire to live in the hill country. Every time I moved, I would long to return. God gave me a home here in beautiful surroundings…a home that fits me like Cinderella’s slipper fit her and no one has ever been able to take it from me.
               As I continue looking out the window I thank God for the green grass;  pecan, mesquite, and oak trees. I thank Him for cool mornings that allow me to have my windows open to hear birds chirping and squirrels chattering. It is quiet and peaceful.
               My children are grown and do a great job of caring for themselves and their families. I have no husband hurrying me up; changing my plans when I am trying to read or write.
               Lord, forgive me when I whine…today I have it all…the world is mine.
               What an amazing miracle, that our God who created the universe,  cares enough about us to send His Holy Spirit and reveal when we are “there”.
               “There” use to be a place unreachable and at least down the road. What struggles I had in life trying to reach “there”. Then when I began to feel that I was totally worn out from the effort, God showed me that I am there.   I am as close to Heaven on Earth as I will ever be.
               God may call me out from time to time and say, “Go here or go here”, but from experience I know this is my “there” (the place I belong). I’ll always return to my “there”.
               And of course, our best “there” is where our Lord is. Wherever He may send us, He will be “there” as He promised in John 14:3 referring to Heaven above and I believe on earth as well.

                               “And if I go and prepare a place for you,
                                I will come again and receive you unto Myself;
                                that  where I am, “THERE” ye shall be also.”

               Kelly, we know that you are alive and well and full of life in Heaven with your Heavenly Father. In His special Grace, God sent your mom this strong assurance. We can never forget you. Your sweet words are eternal in our hearts and in God’s atmosphere. They ring true and we know that you have definitely found your “there”. We will all join you one day and be totally satisfied with our “there”. We love you always.